Every person has within themselves a natural spirit whose inherent state of being is to be content, grateful, loving, and peaceful, regardless of its external circumstances. We don’t see it because it gets covered by the negative thoughts, anxieties, angers, and desires of the world. As I internalize this fact, I understand what happened to me and why I am the way I am. When I was very young, for only a brief moment the veil was lifted and I experienced the unhidden soul. It compelled me to study religion, philosophy, and ancient wisdom, searching for some truth I only vaguely knew was there. It was an impulse and a force I did not understand and could not turn back even if I wanted to. One of my professors remarked, “Why do you think about these things? Other kids are playing basketball.” I didn’t know the answer then, but I know it now.

Al-Ghazālī put it this way [Iḥyā 3/12]: The heart is like a mirror that has been rusted over by the thoughts, sins, and desires of the world. As you control your mind and purify your heart, pray and give charity and remember God, the mirror gets polished and begins to reflect the Attributes of God: mercy, love, peace, justice, tranquility. The divine attributes begin to flow through you and permeate from you into the world. Then the true nature of the religion is revealed within the soul.

Knowing this has helped me understand both the cause and purpose of my suffering. I suffer because my heart is veiled by the world, I am separated from the divine presence and my natural state of being. But through my suffering I am motivated to find the eternal relief that I have faith is there and to pursue it to the end. If I can defeat my own suffering in this life, then I can help others overcome their suffering too. If I can lift the veil over my own heart and achieve peace, then I can help others do the same. I have no doubt that every individual soul can potentially experience the divine presence, and as more people awaken to it the world will be changed for the better. Realizing this truth is only half of the struggle; the other half is making it happen both within and without.